?

Log in

No account? Create an account

Previous Entry | Next Entry

Weltschmerz

"Hmm. I see. Well I think I may be able to help you. You see, your cat is suffering from what we vets haven't found a word for. His condition is typified by total physical inertia, absence of interest in its ambience -- what we vets call environment -- failure to respond to the conventional external stimuli ... a ball of string, a nice juicy mouse, a bird. To be blunt, your cat is in a rut. It's the old stockbroker syndrome, the suburban fin de siecle ennui, angst, weltschmerz, call it what you will."

"Moping."

"In a way, in a way ... hmm, moping, I must remember that. Now, what's to be done? Tell me sir, have you confused your cat recently?"

"Well we..."

"Shh! No."

"Yes, well I think I can definitely say that your cat badly needs to be confused."

-The Gneech

Comments

( 13 comments — Leave a comment )
camstone
Oct. 30th, 2006 08:05 pm (UTC)
Nothing! It's all in a days work for Confuse-A-Cat.

[Horns play bold music as credits roll by...]

"Confuse-A-Cat Limited...
Incorporating...
|
Amaze-A-Vole LTD.
|
Stun-A-Stoat LTD.
|
Puzzle-A-Puma LTD.
|
Startle-A-Thompson's Gazelle LTD.
|
Bewilderebeest INC.
|
Distract-A-Bee

(Do not accept substitutes...)
the_gneech
Oct. 30th, 2006 08:09 pm (UTC)
I think "Bewilderbeest INC." has to be my favorite.

-The Gneech
panthras
Oct. 30th, 2006 10:44 pm (UTC)
*chuckles* now what could possibly confuse a kitty?

Erm...uh oh...*hides* <.< >.>

Pan
torakiyoshi
Oct. 30th, 2006 11:09 pm (UTC)
What? Reading that spam thingy the other day didn't confuse you enough?

Have teh best

-=TK
exatron
Oct. 31st, 2006 01:35 pm (UTC)
It makes sense if you align your cardboard pickle with the hypersonic chicken's magnetic north.
torakiyoshi
Nov. 1st, 2006 05:12 am (UTC)
I'll keep my cardboard pickle put away where it belongs, thank you very much! ;)

Have teh best

-=TK
sarek_ca
Oct. 31st, 2006 01:23 am (UTC)
I'd rather...
...startle a Thompson's Gazelle.
katayamma
Oct. 31st, 2006 01:53 am (UTC)
Some people are satisfied with simply using weltschmerz in a sentance, but you had to go and write a story about it.

Yes, you DO have waaaaaaaay too much time on your hands at work.
the_gneech
Oct. 31st, 2006 04:13 am (UTC)
I didn't write it; I just reported it.

-The Gneech
hossblacksilver
Oct. 31st, 2006 05:31 am (UTC)
I could just see the cat going, "Alright, stop that. Stop that right now. It's entirely too silly."
kinkyturtle
Oct. 31st, 2006 07:00 am (UTC)
One of my favorite lines is "FETCH OUT... THE FUNNY THINGS!"
xoagray
Oct. 31st, 2006 09:17 am (UTC)
Laser pointer. It'll be hours of entertainment for both of you.

*laughs*
X
kamau_d_lyon
Oct. 31st, 2006 12:19 pm (UTC)
Hey there's a real simple solution for this. Simply hook your cat up with Leona. That should be confusing enough.
( 13 comments — Leave a comment )

Latest Month

August 2019
S M T W T F S
    123
45678910
11121314151617
18192021222324
25262728293031

Tags

Powered by LiveJournal.com
Designed by Tiffany Chow