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The Strange Puritanism of NWN 2

Technically, Neverwinter Nights 2 is quite nice; but the writing is awful. So far, with the exception of the dwarf (who is a real mensch), every NPC who's foisted themselves upon my party is a bitchy little brat who, if my character was actually able to, he'd shove into a mudpile and walk away from. Unfortunately, they've got plot immunity. Oh for the days of Tomi and Linu! I think at some point I'm going to have to play Jade Empire just to get the taste out of my mouth.

But that's not what this post is about! This post is about an oddity of character design, which is this: everybody's dressed like a Puritan. 0.o

The game starts in a little farming village, so I assumed the fact that the men all had turtleneck tunics and gloves, while the women all had ankle-dresses, high collars, little hats, and gloves was just to give it a kind of "Amish village" feel. Even my barbarian is wearing a hide apron, and if you take off the character's armor, he's wearing the same turtleneck-and-gloves outfit as the rest of the village. So, uh, no Arnold-style flexing for my barbarian whether I want him to or not, eh?

But what really got me was when I actually got to the big, cosmopolitan city of Neverwinter. You'd expect busty tavern wenches, beggars in loincloths, perhaps a few street performers with wild tattoos, perhaps? Well, you'd be disappointed.

The first thing that really struck me was that the sorceress who is forced into my party looks like Hester Prynne. Literally. One of these days those fire spells she's always tossing off are going to make a giant scarlet "A" float above the tavern or something.

And get this: the Moonstone Mask, Neverwinter's famous "Everybody-Comes-to-Rick's" style brothel, has been completely sanitized into a, er I guess you'd call it a nightclub (although it sounds more like a community center that rents out meeting rooms), and the one dancing girl is wearing a frock from neck-to-floor and, again, gloves! Her one line of dialogue is "Do you like my dancing, m'lord?" to which my mental reply was, "I wouldn't know, I can't see it."

Nobody in this game even has short sleeves for crying out loud.

I've commented before on water-balloon women in videogames, or on the ridiculousness of chainmail bikinis and barbarians in fur diapers, I fully admit that. On the other hand, if we have to choose between that extreme, or living in a world envisioned by Oliver Cromwell, I'll take the jigglies any day! I gotta wonder what the people at Obsidian were thinking with this thing -- and I only hope that some future patch or expansion will fix this particular bit of nonsense.

Oh well, just another good reason to play Jade Empire!

-The Gneech


( 14 comments — Leave a comment )
Dec. 2nd, 2006 03:03 pm (UTC)
Loved the dwarf. Hated the sorceress. I think I had her in my party all of once, and decided we didn't need firepower nearly that bad.

I didn't really notice the Amishness, myself, possibly because I was distracted by the fact that if your female PC wears a breastplate...well...under-steel must provide a LOT of support.

But hmm, now that you mention it, yeah--the only scantily clad people are the succubi later on. Odd.

Dec. 2nd, 2006 03:14 pm (UTC)
Succubi! That should make a nice change. =)

"Don't, boss! They'll suck out your soul!"

"Eh, I'm not using it anyway. And look! They have navels!"

-The Gneech
Dec. 2nd, 2006 07:13 pm (UTC)
At one point you actually meet a trapped succubus, and some of the character responses are pretty entertaining. "Oo, a succubus! Everybody else get back, I can handle this one!" If the PC's female and you've lugged the paladin along, she also offers to turn into you for him, and he gets all bent outta shape.

The erinyes and I think some of the vampires--can't recall--are also pretty scantily clad, but apparently Good People Wear Clothes.
Dec. 2nd, 2006 05:49 pm (UTC)
This is why you should could draw us cheesecake SJ art some Saturday Grab Bag sketches to make yourself feel better, since you know your artwork is better than this crap and you get to show off...

I can see it now, a variation on the pic of the SJ cast as humans, just wearing different clothing...

Lizard Rat out.
Mind in the Gutter in Albany NY
Dec. 2nd, 2006 07:39 pm (UTC)
How's the modding for this installment of NWN? I'm sure that somebody will make some clothing changes...just like they do for every single RPG that allows modding, and some that don't!

Just look at Morrowind...Modders made nude models for that game, for heaven's sake!

Have a good day!
Dec. 2nd, 2006 10:03 pm (UTC)

Makes me wish my Elder Scrolls III CD weren't dead thanks to spilling various things on it and letting it congeal over time on it and I never noticed...

Hmmm... nude Argonians...

How does one go about making such a mod anyway? I know I wanted to build a massive dungeon off of the map somewhere underwater...

Lizard Rat out.
Weird Wolf in Albany NY
Dec. 5th, 2006 05:44 am (UTC)
Elder Scrolls IV is far less annoying, IMHO. Oblivion is Morrowind, prettied up and with all the Suck taken out.

Dec. 3rd, 2006 05:22 am (UTC)
I haven't seen any mods yet; I'm under the impression that the toolset is only half-baked at the moment but that they're working on it.

Dec. 3rd, 2006 02:26 am (UTC)
How sad. I loved the first NWN, still play it regularly, and have contributed writing to a couple of modules that have won some awards. But for some reason after reading all the poor reviews of NWN2 I haven't picked it up yet. Nor do I wish to based on the stuff I've seen. :(

Thanks for the warnings.

Dec. 3rd, 2006 05:21 am (UTC)
In its defense, the original NWN was quite a disappointment when it first came out, but is still a very playable and kick-butt game with all the patches and expansions. I'm hoping that in a year or so, NWN 2 will be over this rocky start.

Dec. 3rd, 2006 05:41 am (UTC)
Sounds like Obsidian was overcompensating for possible nudie mods and any theoretical Hot Coffee incidents.
Dec. 3rd, 2006 04:01 pm (UTC)
I guess!

Dec. 3rd, 2006 07:13 am (UTC)
Who are you and what have you done with Gneech? o.0
Dec. 3rd, 2006 04:01 pm (UTC)
Le sigh. Nobody understands me!

( 14 comments — Leave a comment )

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