John "The Gneech" Robey (the_gneech) wrote,
John "The Gneech" Robey

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(spooky wind noises)

Well the allergies have receded, and the cough is greatly reduced. Aside from being even sleepier than I usually am, the only thing wrong with me is that I've lost my voice. If I am just sitting around tap-tapping on the keyboard as usual, it's not an issue. But people keep asking me stuff, or saying hello, or doing other things that invite comment, only to be met with a kind of awkward silence as I can't speak in response.

I can whistle, snap, clap, make ticking noises or squeal like the air slowly coming out of a pinched balloon, but that's about it. If I absolutely must talk, I can only do it in a breathless whisper that makes me sound vaguely like a ghost.

It's one of those things, like you don't realize how much you use your vision until you try going through a day blindfolded ... you don't realize how important the ability to vocalize is until you can't do it. I can't phone up the doctor for my next appointment, I can't tell the guy at the lunch counter what kind of sandwich I want, I can't tell Buddha he's a good kitty (or a bad one, as applicable), etc. If my phone rings, I just sort of look at it as if to say, "Yeah, what do you want?" Normally, I'm also prone to doing impressions and funny voices, or singing obscure old songs, neither of which I can do at the moment, leaving me feeling vaguely "off".

I presume this is a temporary result of having gunk on my vocal chords, and will go away sooner or later. Meanwhile, at least I have an excuse to not talk to my boss. ;)

-The Gneech
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