Walking the streets of New York , nothing cheers me up like signs written under the impression that quotation marks convey emphasis. One of my favorites is a cleaners that advertises its "FREE PICK UP AND DELIVERY" as if there's something hypothetical about the service.
From The Smart Set -- Confessions of a Community Theater Critic
During intermission, I ask the acne-riddled undergrad at the urinal next to mine whether he understands what's going on. I ask the question casually, not letting on that I'm actually a semi-professional theatre reviewer. He tells me he hasn't the faintest idea, just knows the actress. I look at the program. He's probably the guy she dedicated her performance to, along with William Shakespeare, Bob Dylan, and her family. And he's probably wondering why an older guy in a raincoat is coming out here on a Sunday night to watch a play his girlfriend is starring in.
-The Gneech
