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Fictionlet

"You are coming to the family reunion and that's that," Isadora said. "You're not hospitalized, you're not in prison, and you're not weaseling out of it."

"Why?" demanded Brigid.

"Because I'm your mother and I said so, that's why!" Isadora replied, voice raised.

"That's not what I mean," Brigid said. "Why do you care if I go to the damn thing? Why do we even have them? This isn't the 1800s or something, where your family consisted of half the town and half the next town over. I've got better things to do than spend my weekend in a ratty old house in the country staring awkwardly at fifty complete strangers that I happen to share genetic lineage with."

"They're not complete strangers," said Isadora. "You've met almost all of them before."

"When I was eight years old! That may seem like yesterday to you, but to me it was a long time ago."

"What about your Aunt Edna? You see her every year at Thanksgiving. And your Aunt Charlotte, and your Cousin Gilroy, and--"

"--and as soon as I get away from them, I head for the nearest bottle of alcohol to get blotto and wipe out the pain," Brigid said. "The fact that they're all going to be there is even more reason to run-not-walk to the nearest desert island."

"Brigid!"

"No!"

"Brigid!"

"NO!"

Isadora's voice went cold and quiet. "Brigid Elaine," she said.

Brigid went very still, and her eyes started to flicker from the floor to the table to the wall -- anywhere but at her mother. Finally she said, "If I go to this damn thing, I'm bringing Greg along."

"Greg?" said Isadora. "Why Greg? He's perfectly welcome, I'm sure, but why would you want to?"

"Because. I'm telling them that he's my boyfriend."

"Why on Earth would you want to do that?"

"And you're going to back me up on that," Brigid added.

"You expect me to lie to the family just like that?" Isadora said.

"Oh, like that's something new, Mrs. Kidney Transplant."

Isadora sniffed. "That was an emergency," she said. "Desperate measures were called for."

"Well so are they now. If it means so much to you for me to go, then you'll just have to play along. The granmas and aunties can poke and prod and plan my wedding for me all they like -- but I won't stand there and submit to interrogation as to 'why I haven't settled down yet'. Not again."

Isadora's face softened at this. "All right," she said. "Have it your way. But you might want to let Greg know before you get there, or he might start flirting with one of your cousins."

"They wouldn't be able to tell if he was," Brigid replied.

-The Gneech

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Comments

( 12 comments — Leave a comment )
tr_wolf
Sep. 19th, 2007 03:56 pm (UTC)
I've never read fictionlet yet. You should give it its own LJ :)
the_gneech
Sep. 19th, 2007 04:26 pm (UTC)
Que?

-TG
tr_wolf
Sep. 19th, 2007 06:41 pm (UTC)
I dun like Fictionlet (for I am spawn of satan!!), and prefer reading your journal for you, not Fictionlet, and perhaps if Fictionlet had its own journal, people could follow it.

Or do I just come across sounding like an asshole? :/
the_gneech
Sep. 19th, 2007 07:14 pm (UTC)
No, you don't sound like an asshole, but it seems to me that the Fictionlets are easy enough to skip if you aren't interested in them. :)

-TG
huskyteer
Sep. 19th, 2007 04:07 pm (UTC)
Brilliant punchline.
the_gneech
Sep. 19th, 2007 04:27 pm (UTC)
Thanks! :)

-TG
wbwolf
Sep. 19th, 2007 04:25 pm (UTC)
Ah yes.. the magical power of a parental unit using a child's full name. You know you're in trouble then.
(Deleted comment)
kylet
Sep. 19th, 2007 07:04 pm (UTC)
Agreed. Must see.

All around great, but as noted, yeah, one of my favorite punchlines evar XD
jedi_iwakura
Sep. 19th, 2007 11:32 pm (UTC)
That's pretty much every single family get-together I've had since high-school.

T____T
confusedoo
Sep. 20th, 2007 03:26 am (UTC)
I hope these longer fictionlets are indicative of novel-ly goodness to come. :)
exatron
Sep. 20th, 2007 04:17 am (UTC)
Wow, I've never seen Isadora at full name mad before. Or Brigid throwing a temper tantrum, for that matter.

I third seeing the family reunion, and given the way the Fictionlets jump around in time, it's possible that we've seen parts of it already.
hbar98
Sep. 21st, 2007 04:54 pm (UTC)
And I thought I was the only one whose parents gave them a good yelling name.

My parents never had to spank me. Instead, they would just yell my full name and I would just melt.

Try it sometime...Holler like you mean it, "Chad Daniel", but do a little pause as you go from one d to the next, but don't stop making the d noise. No matter where you are I will probably hear you. And I will shudder.
( 12 comments — Leave a comment )

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