But SJ is going on its break fairly soon ("soon" being a relative term, considering I expected it to have happened already about four months ago), which is going to open up wide swaths of time I'm not used to having. Granted, I have a ton of projects I want to work on, so it's not going to be like I have nothing to do ... but it's going to be quite different from my current existence of "being at the drawing table except when I'm not".
I find myself wondering, when the time comes, how I'm going to react to that. Am I going to freeze up in indecision, unable to pick which long-shelved project to start first? Am I going to have a burst of creativity as I dash off item after item? Or am I going to get sucked into some time-sink and find myself unpleasantly surprised when a year has gone by and I haven't actually done anything?
Honestly, I don't know. I really can't imagine sitting on my duff forever, it's just not in my nature. But there is always a nagging worry in the back of my head that I might, if only because I know so many people who have. Somewhere in there I think is also a burning desire to send a symbolic F-U to all those people who beat me up as a child with the phrase "Not living up to your potential." I'm not living up to my potential, you say? Well guess what, teach, you're not living up to my potential either.
Thing is, the post-SJ projects I want to work on are so varied that I don't have a clear idea of what working on them is going to be like, and I guess that has me feeling apprehensive about the disruption of what routine I've got. How do I start? How do I stop? How will I know I'm making progress? Should I start obsessively making lists? Should I play it all by ear?
Something I would like to do is to buff up my body of work. I found myself idly reviewing my bibliography today, and feeling like it seemed woefully thin for all the blood, sweat, and tears I've poured into it. That, combined with the Rex Stout anthology I'm currently reading, made me ponder the idea of making a goal to write a short story every month, hopefully for publication in some form or other. But then I thought, "If I do that, will I find myself just as shackled and unable to work on other projects as I did when I was working on the comic?" I also thought of trying to send, say, five single-panel cartoons to The New Yorker or whomever a month ... with the same thought.
So ... I don't know. I'm open to suggestions. It's not something I have to confront immediately by any stretch of the imagination, but it is something I'm going to be thinking about in the upcoming weeks/months/whatever.
But now, off to rescue our kitty from the vet!