John "The Gneech" Robey (the_gneech) wrote,
John "The Gneech" Robey
the_gneech

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Who's Who in the B&G Fictionlets, cot'd

Continued from the previous entry on the subject. As before, input welcome!

GREG BUMERLI — AMENDMENT
Apartment is leased, not owned. Also, once in a very great while, Greg smokes a pipe that he inherited from his grandfather.

UNCLE BOB — ADDENDUM
Calls his car "Black Beauty."

YVONNE
Young woman, dark hair, "midriff." Neighbor across the hall from B&G; works at "Big Book Barn," apparently has a thing about writers. Last time encountered, was crushing on Greg and closely following his blog. Made a quite OTT proposal to Greg which sent him tumbling out of his chair and forced him to take off the rest of the day with one of his headaches. Described as being "the sort of girl who writes Darcy/Brandon slash."

WENTON DELANEY
Large, burly man with a beard and a fondness for cigars. Mystery writer who Greg admires, but who also seems to enjoy Greg's writing. Lives in Boulder, Colorado, but occasionally comes to town (presumably for book signings or something similar) and meets Greg for lunch.

THOMAS
Sharon's boyfriend (now ex-), who wouldn't move in with her unless she got rid of Ozymandias. Eventually broke up with her anyway.

WRETCHED JULIA, HERB THE EVANGELIST, TOM THE THUG, AND TACTLESS CHARLOTTE
Brigid's cousin Julia and her family. Julia believes that the highest purpose of any person is procreation; Herb (Julia's husband) lectures his pastor on the proper way to officiate his church; Tom (Julia's youngest son) seems to resent everybody and sulks; Charlotte (Julia's eldest daughter) makes disparaging or inappropriately personal comments about everyone around her.

COLE
One of Brigid's dates that ended up with her spending the night at his place. Has spiky hair and teaches at "Leaping Tiger Martial Arts." Somewhat laconic and very casual about leaving her in his apartment the next morning while he goes off to teach class.

ARTHUR
Acquaintance of B&G; apparently a black playwright.

BRIAN
Former boyfriend of Brigid, who had excellent taste in pizza restaurants.

TAYLOR
Someone B&G met at a party. Bored everyone by talking about his new car.

ROGER
One of Brigid's failed dates. His values in life are peace, love, and vitriolic rants against the right wing.

GARY SOMETHING-UNPRONOUNCEABLE-AND-LITHUANIAN
One of Brigid's failed dates, apparently to her disappointment.

GROUNDSKEEPER
A short, Hispanic woman who takes care of the grounds of the apartment and is quite friendly despite her shaky grasp on English.

JASON
A guy whom some woman Alex was crazy about, was crazy about.

DR. CLENCH
An ophthalmologist with advertisements on the radio.

MISS LEBSDALE
One of Brigid's teachers in grade school, quite uptight and hostile. Referred to by the kids as "Miss Lobster." Enraged by Brigid's assertion that chewy fruit snacks were "unicorn poop."

BRIGID'S COUSIN THE THROAT MODEL
No name given. Appears on a billboard on Ketlington Avenue.

AUNT EDNA
Brigid's elderly aunt, who apparently thinks that any woman not "firmly attached" by 20 must be a lesbian.

AUNT CHARLOTTE
An aunt of Brigid's, who attends Thanksgivings and family reunions.

COUSIN GILROY
A cousin of Brigid's, who attends Thanksgivings and family reunions.

DARLA
One of Brigid's co-workers. Likes lame jokes sent via e-mail, mostly from her sister.

WAYNE
One of Brigid's co-workers.

JEANIE
One of Brigid's co-workers, who is obnoxiously perky in the morning.

KAREN AND VIVIAN
Friends of Jeanie's, presumably some of Brigid's co-workers as well.

JANEEN
One of Brigid's co-workers, some sort of manager. Her "ghost" was held in limbo by Brigid's refusal to put her earphones either on or down.

CHRIS
One of Brigid's co-workers.

PROFESSOR GIERS
Greg's "Contemporary Philosophy" instructor in college, who had a mental breakdown when Greg suggested that some ideas might be more valid than others.

BRENDA
The mother of Chestina Elizabeth.

CHESTINA ELIZABETH
Infant daughter of Brenda.

THE CRITIC
A newspaper critic who gave Retrograde Maneuvers a glowing review, ascribing more depth to it than Greg felt the book deserved. Told Greg he was being neurotic and compared him to Steve Martin.

THE READER
A short man with dark hair, bushy eyebrows, and dusky complexion, who spoke with an unidentifiable (possibly Slavic) accent, who thought Retrograde Maneuvers was a very dull book.

VOICES IN THE CAR IMPOUND
A pair of vulgar and boorish voices overheard in the car impound by Brigid and Greg as they were sneaking around, one male and one female.

STEGGLES
A name mentioned in connection with the car impound; apparently Brigid and Greg were searching for his car.

THE WOMAN ON THE PLANE
A woman seated on a plane next to Brigid, who wouldn't let her read her "Ward Fowler" book.

WILLIAM ASHBLESS
Author of the "Ward Fowler" mysteries. Named after the fictional poet.

"LADY NEMO"
A local playwright who claimed she didn't want her name on "Dueling Realities" so it would be "for the ages."

MANUEL
A fictional gender-flipped, bed-hopping caricature of how women are portrayed in porn movies, in the play "Dueling Realities."

AUGUSTUS "GUS" BURNS
A character from one of Greg's books (but which book has not been mentioned).

BIG BOOK BARN
A large chain bookstore, similar to Borders or Barnes & Noble.

ONETRUECON
Fantasy/SF/comics convention Greg and Alex attended, where Alex ate a lot of olives. Similar to Dragon*Con.

THE PIT
An "olive bar" restaurant.

USED BOOKSTORE ON ROBINSON
Within walking distance; Greg moderates his binges by only buying what he can carry home.

RETROGRADE MANEUVERS
Greg's first book. The cover depicts a stylized cartoon man sitting backwards on a stylized cartoon motorcycle, pointing as if to say "Go that way!" The main character does ride a motorcycle, but not backwards.

FUNNY LOOKS
Greg's second book.

OMGWTFBBQ
An obscure band who had an EP.

THE SEXY HAZMATS
An obscure band who had one album and then split up two months after it was released.

OCX CONCEPTS, INC.
A business that has an office in the same building where Brigid works; there never seems to be anybody there actually doing anything.

THE WARD FOWLER MYSTERIES
A "whodunit" series Brigid likes, written by William Ashbless. Named after William Shatner's character on Columbo.

QUEEN OF PORTO BELLO
A book Brigid investigated at a bookstore.

HARCOURT PARK STAGE
The local theater where Greg saw "Dueling Realities."

DUELING REALITIES
An artsy, gender-politics-heavy play by "Lady Nemo" that Greg reviewed.

KIMBALL HALL
A building at the college Greg attended, where he was chased by the enraged Professor Giers.

-The Gneech
Tags: brigid and greg, writing
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