January 31st, 2003


Wow, That Was ... Awful

I watched Brotherhood of the Wolf this evening; it was lame. Not even entertainingly lame, more like, "EEEEND! EEENNND! WHY AREN'T YOU OVER YEEEEET???" lame. The only good thing was Mark Dacascos (the hero of Only the Strong, which was a much better movie) playing a Mohawk indian (eh?) who knows amazing Kung Fu (whaaaaat?). Unfortunately, he gets killed 2/3 of the way through (oops, sorry for the spoiler, but this movie's pretty spoiled just by watching it), and you have to sit and watch the rest of the movie without him.

In the lead actor's defense (a Gerard Depardeux wannabe who fortunately was more charming, more handsome, and has a much smaller nose), his Kung Fu was pretty good too.

Kung Fu? KUNG FU??? In 18th Century France???

We rented this movie at the same time that we rented Dave Barry's flick Big Trouble, which was vastly superior in every way, with the possible exception of not having any Kung Fu. But in Big Trouble, Kung Fu would have fit better and made more sense in the story. Go fig.

So, in a nutshell: Go rent Big Trouble, while being extremely careful not to slip and rent Brotherhood of the Wolf by mistake.

Trust me on this.

-The Gneech
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