March 29th, 2003

Kero Power Tie

And Now, What You've All Been Waiting For...

Yes, it's my Saturday Morning Adventure with Spanky the Wonder Scale! Brought to you this week by Earl Sheen's House of Spleens -- "We get the spleens, by any means!"

Well, Spanky was in a fine mood this morning ... I put him on one part of the floor and he said, "278 lbs, 48% bodyfat" and I said, "Are you taking crack?"

So then I moved him over about two inches and tried again; this time he said "266 lbs, 39% bodyfat," which is somewhere closer to reality. Given that the caliper test the chiropractor did said "32% bodyfat," I'm going to go ahead and take the lower reading this week. ;P

I don't know why I keep bothering with Spanky, given what a fruitcake he is. I think at this stage it may be for the sheer entertainment value of it. It's like a slot machine, y'know? Will Spanky come up lemons or cherries? I'd like it if he'd start flashing lights, ringing bells, and spitting out money ... but somehow I kinda doubt that's going to happen.

What gets me is the fluctuation in the bodyfat percentage. That's an electrical resistance-based test, i.e., the scale sends a very low-level electric charge through me and judges my bodyfat percentage based on how much of a resistor I am. So why in Sam Hill does that fluctuate when I move the scale over an inch? I don't become more resistant to electricity if I'm standing here instead of standing there do I?

Well anyway, that's enough of this silliness ... it's off to breakfast and a long day of cartooning for me. Catcha later!

-The Gneech
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