November 16th, 2005

Party Guy

Happy Birthday, spikedpunch!

For your present, here's Today's Forgotten English!

barber's news
As true as barber's news, untrustworthy. Barber shops have, since Roman times, been centres of gossip and rumour.
--Albert Hyamson's Dictionary of English Phrases, 1922

All the News
Eliezer Edwards's Words, Fact, and Phrases: A Dictionary of Curious Matters (1882) dashed a modern misconception of the etymology of news: "The word is commonly believe to be formed of the initial letters of the names of the four cardinal points. If, however, this be the case, it is difficult to understand how the synonymous foreign words, nova and nouvelles, which are spelt in a totally different manner, can mean the same thing. But it is not necessary to go out of our language to refute the NEWS theory. The word news was formerly spelt newes [also newis and newys 500 years ago] and as this contained five letters, it completely negates the suggestions that the word was derived from the four letters on the weathercock. It was probably derived from the German das neue (in the nominative case and neuter gender). The German phrase Was giebt neues? is the exact equivalent of th English What is the news?

-The Gneech
Scar Surrounded


"Well, no, it makes perfect sense in context," said Greg.

"It does?" Brigid asked, staring at the title of the text on his screen in mild confusion.

"Well, yes. You see, I was driving along behind this guy in traffic, who had a variety of political bumper stickers all over his car. There was a Kerry/Edwards sticker, and one rather smug one to the effect that anybody who claimed to be a conservative couldn't possibly have feelings of any kind, and another that essentially espoused peace, love, and viciously beating republicans about the face and neck. But for all his vaunted touchy-feely social awareness, he was a vicious brute behind the wheel: constantly honking, tailgaiting, double-dipping at stopsigns, cutting people off, and so on."

Brigid nodded. "Okay," she said. "And...?"

"Well, as I was driving along behind this hazard to life and limb, an advertisement came on the radio for an opthamologist by the unfortunate name of 'Doctor Clench.'" Brigid giggled momentarily at that, and Greg continued, "So I had this vision, you see..." He suddenly screwed up his face in a contortion of effort, and said, "HELLO! I am DR. CLENCH, and I'm going to be WORKING ON YOUR EYE if that's ALL RIGHT WITH -- *urk* -- YOU!" Then, rapidly shifting into an exaggerated vision of anger, shouted in reply, "KEEP AWAY FROM MY EYES, YOU JACKASS!!!"

Brigid buried her face into the palm of her hand. "So that's where you got the title, 'The Adventures of Doctor Clench and the Road-Rage Liberal,'" she said.

"Well," said Greg, "at least it's unique."

-The Gneech

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Yue grim

I'm STILL Working On This???

I've been working on this Friday's and next Monday's strips since Saturday. :P I was so glad to be ahead, so I could relax and have fun on Sunday ... but all week, something's come along every night to keep me away from the drawing table.


Note to myself: next time you get a little bit ahead, KEEP WORKING.

Le sigh. :P

-The Gneech
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