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Eats, Shoots & Leaves, Jan 3

This year my desk calendar is taking a break from the Forgotten English and is instead epigrams from Lynne Truss, author of Eats, Shoots & Leaves. Periodically, when there’s a particularly good one, I shall repost them here. For instance, this past Tuesday’s…

While significant variations exist between British and American usage, these are matters for quite rarefied concern. You say “parentheses” while we say “brackets” … but to people who call an apostrophe “one of them floating comma things” it just doesn’t matter very much.

–Lynne Truss, Eats, Shoots & Leaves</p>

-The Gneech

Originally published at gneech.com. You can comment here or there.

Comments

radbaron
Jan. 5th, 2012 05:31 pm (UTC)
A panda walks into a café. He orders a sandwich, eats it, then draws a gun and proceeds to fire it at the other patrons.

'Why?' asks the confused, surviving waiter amidst the carnage, as the panda makes towards the exit. The panda produces a badly punctuated wildlife manual and tosses it over his shoulder.

'Well, I'm a panda,' he says, at the door. 'Look it up.'
The waiter turns to the relevant entry in the manual and, sure enough, finds an explanation. 'Panda. Large black-and-white bear-like mammal, native to China. Eats, shoots and leaves.'

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