John "The Gneech" Robey (the_gneech) wrote,
John "The Gneech" Robey

Starbucks Moments: Lessons Learned

So a few days ago I posted to my LJ:

So I suppose it makes a certain amount of sense that weekend morning shifts started coming at me relentlessly. If the Universe wanted me to say adios to the job, that's probably the most effective way to do it. On the other hand, I kinda feel like I was nudged into taking the job by the Universe in the first place, so... What gives, Universe? Did you want me to take the job or not? :P

Last night, while on one of my breaks, I was ruminating on this topic, and the answer came back to me, “To show you the lessons you've been learning in action.” And I thought about this a bit. I thought about G____ not being able to handle basic tasks, much less challenges, and her passive-aggressive approach to everything. I thought about A____'s oblivious “show up, add another task to the pile, and then disappear without helping” behavior and how it builds resentment and actually prevents things from getting done. I thought about B____'s laid back “You do this, I'll do this, and it'll all get done” approach, and D____'s “I will carry the whole store on my back and get beat up in the process, and just quietly wish I were doing something else” mindset, and of course I thought of all the customers for whom having just the right drink made the right way was a touchstone that helped them cope in a world that was too much for them.

I thought about the pettiness of hustling, like the guy who keeps trying to order “a refill” without a cup, because it's fifty cents instead of $1.50. You've clearly got a job, dude, why are you embarrassing yourself and me over a dollar? I thought about the people who come in and buy 5 shots of espresso on top of a venti frappuccino, paying $7+ bucks without batting an eye for a drink that's going to eventually kill them.

And finally I thought about how chill I was when I started the job, how stressed out I got as the holiday season picked up and we were suddenly busy, and what a depressing grind it was working weekend mornings, where you came in and the store was burning down, and it was just going to be like that all day, and compared that to this past Sunday, when I asked the Universe to arrange things so that I had an enjoyable shift that left me feeling better at the end of it than I did at the beginning... and the Universe delivered. I was still tired, of course, but I was tired and happy, instead of tired and miserable.

So maybe the answer is that yes, the Universe did want me to take the job, kinda like an exam in the whole “awakening” course it's been putting me through, and now having passed the test (I assume?), the job has fulfilled its function and I can put it behind me.

-The Gneech
Tags: crackpottery, meditation, moments, starbucks moments
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