John "The Gneech" Robey (the_gneech) wrote,
John "The Gneech" Robey
the_gneech

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Deep Thoughts

Snagged from softpaw...

  • I used to eat a lot of natural foods until I learned that most people die of natural causes.

  • When weeding, the best way to make sure you are removing a weed and not a valuable plant is to pull on it. If it comes out of the ground easily, it is a valuable plant.

  • An unbreakable toy is useful for breaking other toys.

  • If quitters never win, and winners never quit, then who is the fool who said: "Quit while you're ahead?"

  • Health is merely the slowest possible rate at which one can die.

  • Give a person a fish and you feed them for a day; teach that person to use the Internet and they won't bother you for weeks.

  • Some people are like Slinkies .... not really good for anything, but you still can't help but smile when you see one tumble down the stairs.

  • Health nuts are going to feel stupid someday, lying in hospitals dying of nothing.

  • Whenever I feel blue, I start breathing again.

  • All of us could take a lesson from the weather. It pays no attention to criticism.

  • Why does a slight tax increase cost you two hundred dollars while a substantial tax cut saves you thirty cents?

  • In the 60's, people took acid to make the world weird. Now the world is weird and people take Prozac to make it normal.

  • How is it one careless match can start a forest fire, but it takes a whole box to start a campfire?

-The Gneech
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